Posts tagged “Harley

The 2012 “Listen Up!” Awards: The Triumphant Return of the Harleys

Time really flies, doesn’t it? It feels like only yesterday that I was writing my year-end Harley Awards post, when in fact it was around 367 days ago. As I write this we have exactly a month left before the end of the Mayan calendar, which everyone has apparently equated with the end of the world. Why doesn’t the human race ever learn that we are incapable of predicting the apocalypse? Every time people have thought doomsday was upon us, absolutely nothing happened and we all carried on with business as usual. So you might not want to quit your job and spend all the money in your savings account on a bomb shelter under the assumption that your life is about to become a Roland Emmerich movie.

Anyway, as 2012 is approaching its conclusion, it’s time once again for me to celebrate achievements in totally arbitrary categories that I made up myself. In other words, it’s just another typical awards show. It’s time to bring on the 2012 Harleys!

As always, the fun begins after the jump.

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The 2011 “Listen Up!” Awards: Handing Out The Harleys

So here we are, entering the home stretch of the year 2011. And if you actually believe that whole stupid Mayan apocalypse theory, we’re entering the home stretch of the human race. On that happy note, we’re going to be seeing some year-end lists popping up some time in the next couple of weeks. I figure I might as well submit my own, but just as I did last time I’ll be looking at unconventional categories (read: totally arbitrary distinctions that I made up myself). It’s time for the 2011 Harleys!

Who's a good little award statuette? YOU ARE! Come here and let me scratch you!

The fun begins, as always, after the jump. Bring on the first award!

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Top 5 Favorite Driving Songs

Everyone’s got songs that they love listening to while driving their cars. The music brightens your mood and makes you want to sing along. It’s something fun to do between stopping at that stupid red light that always catches you while you’re in a hurry and cussing out the jackass who just cut you off so he could drive under the damn speed limit even though there’s nobody behind you for about half a mile. And you’d better enjoy it while it lasts because once you get to work the only station you’ll be listening to all day will be the soft-rock/adult contemporary station that plays “Hey, Soul Sister” by Train three times an hour.

In other cases, the music is full of fast-paced rhythms and heavy riffage that makes your adrenaline start to flow, and you start thrashing the steering wheel all around, driving like a maniac… WHIPLASH!

…I’m sorry, that wasn’t very funny. See, if you start driving like a maniac, it puts you at risk to hit a telephone pole or something, and then your head will jerk backwards and you might actually get whiplash. Or at least that was a problem before they started putting those headrests on the front seats. Well, the whiplash part, anyway. I’m pretty sure maniacs crashing into stuff is still an issue.

So now I’m gonna hit you with a couple honorable mentions, and then the top 5 will follow after the jump.

HONORABLE MENTION #1:

Queens Of The Stone Age, “Go With The Flow”

HONORABLE MENTION #2:

Muse, “Knights Of Cydonia”

(Incidentally, these songs also happen to have two of the coolest music videos ever made. Coincidence, or part of something greater? … It’s a coincidence.)

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Colin’s Collection: The Class of 2010

My last Colin’s Collection post was written about a year ago, around the time I picked up Spoon’s Transference. Over the past 12 months I’ve added quite a bit of music to the ol’ collection, though not as much as plenty of other people. I’ve seen posts by random people who don’t work for music magazines or professional music blogs who have more albums in their “favorites of the year” lists than I bought all year, period. Also, I’m one of those weirdos who still likes to have a physical copy of an album and doesn’t download much music at all.

Spoon's liner notes: Proof that I'm not the only weirdo.

So aside from the aforementioned Transference, what other music did I pick up in 2010? Don’t touch that dial — or mouse… or whatever… because the list is coming up after the jump.

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The 2009 “Listen Up!” Awards

Well, with 2009 approaching the ol’ finish line, you’ll start seeing lots of year-end wrap-up lists and things. And since it’s the end of the Double-0 Decade, you’ll be seeing lots of decade recap lists as well. (Some early spoilers: Pitchfork has crowned Radiohead’s Kid A the best album of the Double-0s, while the NME favors Is This It by the Strokes.)

But you won’t find that here, and not now. No, here you will find a year-end recap that dares to be somewhat different. This is the first-ever Listen Up! Year-End Awards ceremony – or you can just name them the Harleys after the adorable little trophy I’m giving out to the winners.

Let's see the Academy beat THIS one.

The fun begins after the jump!

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Damn It, Kanye!

kanye-vs-colin

By now everyone knows about Kanye West interrupting Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech at the MTV Video Music Awards on Sunday, right? Right. Seriously, man… just when you think Kanye can’t be any more of a douchebag, he finds a way to out-douche himself. Taylor Swift went from looking like she’d just seen the world’s cutest puppy dog (after hearing them announce her name) to looking like she was about to burst into tears right there on the stage (after Kanye did his thing).

And for the record, THIS is the worlds cutest puppy dog. His name is Harley and hes all mine.

And for the record, THIS is the world's cutest puppy dog. His name is Harley and he's all mine.

But fear not, Miss Swift, for the entire Internet has seen fit to avenge you by tearing the asshole a new asshole. The result is I’mma Let You Finish, which has yielded some pretty hilarious results (and some not-so-hilarious results involving 9/11 and the recently departed Patrick Swayze). I’ve been having some fun with this one over the past few days. The fruits of my madness after the jump!

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