ENJOY THE GENIUS 2: Electric Boogaloo

In case you’re wondering, ENJOY THE GENIUS 1 was that last video posted in the Top 5 Songs I Want In Guitar Hero post. It’s the one with the kids singing about video games. And it gave me an idea — devote a recurring segment on this blog to finding the most incredible music the Internet has to offer and putting it on display for you all because I love you. A video can qualify for ENJOY THE GENIUS status in a number of ways. The video can be amazing, the song can be amazing, the singer’s voice can be amazing, the guitarist can play an incredible solo, etc., etc. And of course, when I say “brilliant” or “incredible,” I am being completely and utterly facetious. Now sit back, relax, and ENJOY THE GENIUS.

When your band is the first thing that comes up in a YouTube search for “worst band ever,” you’ve got something special going on. Whatever you do, DON’T BREAK UP. Plus, I only wish I could sing half as well as this dude can. Who cares if he’s completely off-key? He’s a rebel, man! That’s what art is all about — doing something that nobody’s ever done before. Well, except maybe William Hung.

This band gives me hope for the future of music. They deserve our utmost congratulations for achieving the seemingly unachievable — they’ve taken a great song and rendered it completely unlistenable.

Now, I know those first two videos are really old. But still… you gotta pay homage to the classics, man. Of course, sometimes a video will come along that has “INSTANT CLASSIC” written all over it in big, bright, flamboyantly colored, flashing capital letters. Anyone who’s been to Stereogum or YouTube lately will surely appreciate the brilliance that is the Microsoft Songsmith.

It’s a Microsoft program that lets you sing into your computer through a microphone and then crafts the cheesiest musical accompaniment that it can possibly muster. It doesn’t really matter whether or not it’s on key, and it matters even less if it actually fits the song. As an example, here’s what Weezer’s “Buddy Holly” is supposed to sound like.

Now here’s a Songsmith-remixed version of Weezer’s “Buddy Holly” that as far as I know hasn’t been posted for people to laugh at on Stereogum yet.

I don’t know about you, but nothing makes me want to do the Hand Jive and the Jitterbug and the Twist and other various ’50s dances more than a good old-fashioned plodding piano ballad.

Lesson learned: stick with MusicShake for all your make-your-own-songs-with-your-computer needs. Plus, MusicShake is free — unless you want to download some MP3s of your songs, in which case the pricing is similar to that of iTunes.

That’s all for now. Stay tuned for further installments of… ENJOY THE GENIUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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